I know what we didn’t do, but I don’t know what we did do. We weren’t at home, and I have no recollection of waking up soaking wet and freezing in a public fountain, so it probably didn’t involve excessive drinking. But when I try to figure out what we did do, Boyfriend and I both just come up with a big fat nothing.
Was anyone with us last year? Does anyone recall seeing us? Is this what I have to look forward to with early-onset Alzheimer’s?
So this year we started planning costumes early (seriously, I think it was still August) in an attempt to make Halloween memorable.
After months spent scouring the internet and carefully planning out relevant, funny, god-I-hope-somebody-gets-this costumes, Boyfriend and I ended up going as exactly nothing for Halloween.
It’s not that we didn’t have good intentions.
We were planning to be Christina Aguilera and CeeLo, circa The Voice.
Boyfriend would have worn some ankle-length red shorts, a red t-shirt and as many fake Rolexes as we could get our hands on. I’d have worn an oversized t-shirt, leggings, a blonde wig, a push-up bra and my best I-went-to-a-public-high-school slut makeup impression.
But fear that no one would get it (or realize that I was in costume…) kept us from pulling the trigger on ordering/purchasing the necessary pieces.
Since our very awesome costume idea fell through, we came up with a backup costume idea that could be thrown together relatively quickly with clothes we already had.
We were going to do Miami Vice costumes – Boyfriend would wear a black t-shirt, white blazer, and his hideous linen pants and white shoes that I never let him wear otherwise, and I would wear a black t-shirt, white blazer and my favorite classy-slut attire of teeny tiny (white) shorts over black tights.
But then it decided to be cold, and we ended up wearing boots and coats and gloves and hats and going to a college production of Rocky Horror as ‘those old people who probably shouldn’t be here since it’s past their bedtime.’
Tonight I’ve got class, so we’ll probably just sit at home and hope to lure children down to our basement with candy. And if no children come, I’ll just eat the two bags of candy so I can be this for Halloween next year:
Ironically, of course. Happy Halloween, y’all!
So did you guys dress up/go out? What were your costumes this year?